Conor Murray On Overcoming His Crushing Self-Doubt & Leaving Munster

“Perfectionism is not a healthy thing.”

Munster and Ireland scrumhalf Conor Murray has opened up about crushing self-doubt, and how it has affected him both on and off the field over the years.

Arguably the best nine in world rugby right now, Murray says there has been times where he feels he has put too much pressure on himself. In an exclusive interview with The Times, Murray says he would go days without speaking to his family over a mistake made in a match.

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“There have been times when I have put way too much pressure on myself. If something went wrong, if I passed the ball along the ground or kicked it out on the full, I would dwell on it. It would take me five days to speak to my family.” Murray says

He says perfectionism is not healthy, and over the last two years he has changed the way he approaches rugby.

“I used to write everything down in a book and make sure it was all really neat. I had a list of things I had to do and my whole world would be about getting them right. Perfectionism is not a healthy thing. One game I just said, ‘F*** that’. You are supposed to enjoy this. Over the last two years I have really started to.”

His best friend Simon Zebo is set to depart Munster and the end of the season, and has already be cast out of the national set-u with Ireland. Would Murray ever think of leaving Munster?

It is something I would think about,” he says.

“Playing abroad would be appealing and it would be a cultural, lifestyle change. It would be either London or France and there’s an attraction to both. The competitive side of me means that, if I moved, I’d have to go to a good team with ambitions.”

“There’s a lot to consider. Getting into the international set-up is great but the real mark is how long you last. Money? We’re not badly looked after here. It is a really nice decision, a privileged decision.”